Scheduled Boredom

So last night I got to have a conversation of sorts (over texting) with a friend of mine who I have unfortunately not been able to talk to for a bit.

Conversation had it's usual small talk origins, how we both were doing etc. I then asked about how school was going. Next part of the talk went like this [blue = friend, red = me]:

Boring. Just like every class - Do you like it there? - I guess so. Not really. Its just school. It's all the same. - Are you doing ok? - Haha yea. School is just really boring and its all the same. - Well that's unfortunate to hear. Maybe it'll pick up next semester? - Maybe but I am really just tired of school.

I dunno about you, but upon hearing/seeing this. I felt bad for my friend. Due to the structure of their life right now, my friend just sounded tired and essentially bored. I mean sure they aren't technically bored since there is homework to be done, friends and family to hang out with, and whatever other activities said friend is up to.

But regardless, this outlook on life seemed to me to be just a tad somber.

So this got me thinking. First off, I would go out on a limb and say I know this person fairly well. Secondly, because of that I tend to assume things when talking to this friend (I do that a lot actually; depending on how much time I've spent with you I begin to picture the tone, facial expression, and sometimes body language all from a text message - weird, yes I know). Now I can definitely relate in how day in and day out things are just the same. I mean that's what life after college has been for me unfortunately. Wake up, drive, work, drive, sleep, and repeat. But even so, every day brings a new adventure. However it's up to YOU to stumble upon it. The Lord will guide your steps no matter what and protect you (Jeremiah 29:11). But to experience this world and the sunlight, we must venture out of our shells.

Sure life is boring, but it is what we make of it.

Wallowing in self-pity will get you nowhere. Yes, that is a bit harsh of me. But I only say that because I myself have been caught in that cycle before and will most definitely fall into it again.

I pray for this friend that they can escape this rut of life. And if any of you reading this experience this rut, I would gladly pray for you.

I leave you with these two verses:

"This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it."

Psalm 118:24

"Therefore do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

As my pastor stressed to the congregation today. meditate on Scripture. In doing so, one will become close to God and righteous; and it is the righteous who are truly happy.




To put this all in a nutshell. put your trust in the Lord. For He never fails.

Irony

Irony. There seems to be a decent amount of it in my life. Though to be honest, there's probably a good amount in everyone's lives.

So why bring this up? Well last week was just a tad bit rough for me. Work (at the big boy job) was a bit frustrating and tiring and the awful traffic to and from work didn't help matters much. Then at coaching the kids (as great as they are) were for the most part pretty rambunctious the whole week and my patience being paper thin was on the verge of not existing. Now with that piled up on each other, I also due to stress, tiredness, and laziness was not very disciplined in my time with the Lord and it's been up and down for the past few weeks. Something very very unfortunate. So pretty much I'm close to a tipping point and in Friday rush hour I basically lost it. The usual commute of 55 miles in traffic in the afternoon takes about an hour and a half. Well that Friday I was stuck for two and a half. Things I had planned to do like errands and what not before coaching obviously didn't happen.

But like I said I lost it. Thankfully being in a car by myself with the windows up, no one witnessed the Asian kid screaming in frustration for a few minutes.

Let me tell you, screaming is not good for your throat. [mental note made]

However letting it out like that did help and in a couple of minutes I had calmed down and recollected myself. Needless to say practice went decently well despite some minor hiccups and the weekend was here.

Well the weekend of me being at a swim meet and not really relaxing at all.

Phew sort of a poopy week huh? Yea most definitely. Talk about me being frustrated and stressed. Mind you I have not been that stressed since sophomore year of college and it is not fun at all. I gave up that side of me for a reason and I see again why I did so. Thanks to two great friends and role models that helped me with that back then. And now I've got to re-remember to let my dependence on my own power go and just let the Lord take care of me.

Once again soooo much easier said than done.

But that's not gonna stop me from trying. Oh wait, isn't there a quote on trying? Ah yes the great philosopher Yoda said "Do or do not, there is no try." Hm probably should heed that advice. 

Anyways that intro essentially over. Here comes the irony. So I get to the office this morning and though last night I had read the email that I was assigned to a different team this week and was no longer with my usual senior engineer. Didn't really sink in though til this morning that I now was considered the team lead for our two man teams and responsibilities and trust were put upon me. Pretty amazing how in two months, I've already been entrusted with this. But definitely it is because of the grace of God that I'm 1.) at the company and 2.) even been given this new position.

The Lord is just so good. And He is definitely watching over me. Reminds me how my accident last summer showed me that perhaps the Lord is saving me for some purpose on this earth. But whatever it is, I await the day that I can fulfill it and bring glory to His kingdom.

Low as the valley last week. Starting this week at a peak. Talk about two different sides of a coin. Tis how life is and will always be. But to me, I guess this is how the Lord reminds me how He's in control and I am not.

Like the pastor at Hershey Free church said in his message Sept 30.

We must constantly remember that....

He's God and I'm not.